Eating Disorders

Did you know that twenty percent of all ages, any gender, any color of people who have eating disorders would eventually die without treatment? It is estimated the eight million Americans struggle with eating disorders! People are dying everyday of starvation and it isn’t because they can’t afford food, it’s because they don’t want to eat. Eating disorders are a big issue! When I was younger, I used to struggle with not wanting to eat, which prolonged self-inflicted starvation is referred to as anorexia. I wouldn’t eat because I didn’t like myself. People at my school called me fat, and bullied me really hard. It was really hard to move past not liking myself, and I have social anxiety along with depression because of the bullying. It taught me to be stronger, and I’m so grateful for that experience because it made me more compassionate. My relationship with food is sometimes warped. That feeling of being fat never really goes away, but I’m better. What I went through is definitely the reason I love the topic of bulimia and anorexia, along with body image. It’s really important to me that we find a solution to prevent eating disorders, and promote body acceptance.

A lot of people argue that the media is the reason we have eating disorders, and I agree with that statement. The effects of media on self image, and how we view being thin in today’s media is warped. How can we help to change the media’s perception of what beauty is? I have been interested in eating disorders (purging, bingeing, bulimia, anorexia) correlated with the media for a long time. It’s always been something that has been close to my heart because I struggled with it, and I want to work in fashion. It’d be awesome to see a time when size really doesn’t matter. I’m very interested in how women and men view themselves due to the media, model size, ads on television and in magazines, etc., which is one of the many reasons I chose this book and topic.

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Why isn’t marijuana legal?

In the United States the mortality rate, death by marijuana, is a zero, where as tobacco products is 400,000 and growing. There are many reasons we should legalize, and very few reasons we shouldn’t. in this paper, I will give you a different outlook on how legalizing it, and the real facts about how legalizing marijuana would impact America.

How come alcohol and tobacco products are legal, but marijuana isn’t? They both kill hundreds of thousands every year, but marijuana’s death toll is at a whopping zero. A lot of alcohol-related car crashes are the number one cause of teenage deaths. About 400,000 Americans die from tobacco products, and if you’re still living, very likely use of it will lead to cancer. Many people need to realize that many legal products kill, but marijuana doesn’t. By legalizing it, we can considerably reduce drug problems. People would lose interest, and wouldn’t have to sneak it. Pot might lose its appeal.

People don’t look at the enormous positives that this change could lead too. It would really boost the economy because it’s expensive, and would open up a whole new job market. Pot eases a lot of people’s horrid pain. This drug isn’t addictive; and is an optional one each time you use. Police would have a lot less to worry about, and could focus on more prominent threats. Plus, we pay for drug dealers, putting one in jail for 5 years amounts to about $450,000 including legal council. That’s enough many to educate or get treatment for about 200 people!

Marijuana has very few negatives, but I’m going to talk about them. People argue that legalizing marijuana would make it okay to teenagers. My response is, if they want to do it, they’re going to regardless of whether it’s legal or not. It isn’t as dangerous as some may think. I’m not saying using drugs is okay, (yes marijuana is technically a drug) but I see only positive things coming from this. There will always be a negative side to every situation, but legalizing marijuana is a huge plus.

The pros definitely outweigh the cons. Very few people directly die from controlled use of marijuana, but alcohol kills hundreds every month. The cost for drug busts is hurting us more than the actual drug dealers. It would really boost our economy. By giving you the right facts, I hope you see my side.
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Isaac, My Best Friend

My little brother Isaac has Down Syndrome, and he is 11. He’s pretty high functioning, and knows lots of words. He’s the cutest boy I know, and he lights up my life. It’s not always easy dealing with him, as you can imagine. I love him with all my heart, but my family life is a lot more difficult with him sometimes. We don’t really travel like other families, we can’t just pick up and leave. We have to figure out what works best for him, that he will have activities the whole time, and will have a good time.

I remember when he was younger, it was really hard to get him to speak correctly. My mom would try everything, we took him to speech classes, music classes, everything. Music helped him a lot to learn colors, shapes, and sounds. He went there all the time, and my mom worked really hard to make sure he was paying attention, and not goofing off. It was years of work and dedication to get him to the place he is. My brother is very high functioning, and is very vocal. Some people don’t even believe he has Downs.

He literally is the best person in the whole world. I love him so much, and I know he loves me too. Sometimes the future scares me, because I just worry about him living on his own or trying to get a job. What if he grows up and just stops learning? What if nobody hires him and my parents are forced to support him for the rest of his life? What if he never falls in love? Never drives a car?

Have you ever thought about that? What if you couldn’t do basic daily tasks on your own? How would you feel? Sometimes it’s hard to know what’s going on inside of his head. I just want the best for my little brother. I want him to be happy and healthy forever. I love you, little baby.
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To Be Continued

why do people fuck us over? I’ve been thinking about how selfish people are lately and it literally amazes me how concerned everyone is with only themselves! It’s honestly really sad to me just how lazy people have gotten with each other. Like, nobody ever wants to help out people anymore unless they get rewarded in some way and that is so annoying to me.

Women all around the world are seen as nurturing but men always just put people down. It’s so upseting to me that people don’t care about each other more!

Have women taken this movement to far? Feminism is a very big issue, and I myself consider myself a feminist, but that word has such negative connotations.

Birth control has started a lot of controversy.

Why is it that guys get higher paying jobs? Why can my brothers walk around the house without pants on and nobody bats an eye but if I did that they’d through a fit? I THINK IT’S DISGUSTING. we live in a world where women aren’t viewed as equals, even though we should be valued more, because we take care of people, we give birth, etc.

I have at any given moment about 55 different emotions coarsing through my body and it’s hard to be a teenager sometimes. I just hate dealing with all of the shit I deal with. I rarely feel like a kid anymore with all the drama, future planning, homework, parents, grades, and everything else. It’s hard to stay sane

It has been insane out today. I personally love rain. Just not when I have to drive in a terrential down pour. Driving in weather like that is so scary, but obviously I’m still alive. I don’t know, I’m very aware of my own mortality I guess.

I am the sea

Date a girl who thinks about you. She may be crazy, but she is always telling you what looks good on you. She cares. One week her hair may be green, the next she will add a strip of pink. Her clothes might not match, just like your personalities, they don’t match either. Everything about her is exciting and scary all at the same time.

Sometimes she smokes too many cigarettes, talks too loud, or sings too much, but she is her own person. You fall in love with the indifference in her voice. Her sudden changes in mood, wanting to sing when she’s crying. Dancing while she is driving. You’re smitten with her, it’s starting to become an obsession. Your friends don’t like her, because they don’t understand. Everyone who meets her, falls in love with her or they can’t stand her. She is everywhere, always forgetting her keys or her glasses, but you always have them. You catch her when she falls, because she is too strong to admit her weakness. Her thoughts are original, and drawings are weird, but you love it.

She drags you into a thrift store, with mismatched socks and chucks her cigarette at the last possible second. Her smile lights up your insides. You love her. She has pigtails and she snorts when she laughs. Where did this girl come from? You stopped asking yourself that awhile ago because all you know is she is yours and nobody else’s. Yelling at you when you don’t kiss her and holding you too tight when you do. Too many little quirks to pick your favorite one. You are drawn to her, something deep down need the adventure and the quirks.

She let’s you mess up. She loves you, it’s such a different kind of relationship. You’ve never had anyone ecept you like this, and you know you probably won’t ever be accepted and loved this way again. Don’t let it go, she will stay with you if you treat her bad, but she won’t be happy. She needs you to understand her beautiful chaos. So please, understand her.

Kiss her hard underneath the pouring sky. You need to make her feel beautiful, even though it comes from inside her heart. She feels your glances, knows what every look means. She will kiss you so hard in the middle of the road, you must remeber she is impulsive and wants to love you every second. Keep these things in your head, remember that this is life and it isn’t easy nor perfect. But you think she is perfect.

You think to yourself, “I wouldn’t change a thing about her.”
She glances at you, and ponders, “but you will, you will.” You assure her, but you can’t change the mind of this girl once it’s been set. She is like the sea, constantly moving, constantly changing. Washing away the mistakes in the sand and starting over. Powerful and demanding. Always beautiful and majestic. The ocean is beautiful and so is your girl.

This girl is me. I am that girl. I am the sea.
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Don’t Take Our Guns

Bad things happen everywhere. You can’t really stop it, and you know you will die. So why is it that we get so worked up over death and violence? It’s going to happen. People snap, and take drastic action. It’s not rocket science why people decide to kill other people, or rape people. THEY ARE ILL. MENTALLY ILL. These people could be your neighbors, your friends, your boss, your mother, your brother, your uncle, or anybody else in the world. So why is it that when we here about school shootings, we want to take away guns and other weapons? Line up police officers at our schools? Have teachers armed with weapons? Is that really the solution or is that just an easier option. The real problem is dealing with the mental illness part. How about we have stricter laws on background checks, psychological evaluations, and other things before you are able to purchase a gun? Because I know many mentally stable people who have guns who have never shot anyone, so why should they be punished?

It’s laziness. Pure laziness. ADDRESS THE FUCKING ISSUE. We need to face the issue of gun control head on and establish a healthy knowledge basis around it. Talk about your issues, don’t take them out on people. We need to start having more conversations about people control than gun control, because guns aren’t the issue, people are.

I just don’t know how people can go from saying how cruel the world is and then pointing the finger at weapons. People of America have the right to hold and possess a gun. It’s our 2nd Amendment right to bear arms and that should never be taken away from us. The government already has us by the balls, I don’t want us to be unarmed too. It’s scary to me that all these bombings and shootings are happening, but I’m not surprised. It’s the way we treat mental illness, like you shouldn’t talk about and here, just take this pill, you’ll be fine kind of bullshit. It’s disgusting to me.

This just frustrates me. We need to help the people of this country who really can’t help themselves. We need to be more open about gun safety, and we need to teach our kids about the positives of having guns, but also the negative consequences they can have, like killing someone. It’s not rocket science. I don’t even know why this is an issue, we just need to educate each other and be nice to each other. I know it’s not that simple, but it’s a start.
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Loneliness

Friends are really important. I don’t care who you are, you always want friends. No matter what age, gender, etc you are, everyone needs friends. Companionship is very crucial in life because we need people to share memories, despair, and happy times with. We all need someone who we can rely on, and talk to about our issues. It’s really hard being alone all the time. You can’t always deal with everything on your own, but that isn’t a weakness. Admitting you need help or advice shows amazing strength and humility.

I have been alone a lot of my life. I didn’t have any friends for a really long time, and it was awful. Loneliness is weird, it’s never something you can understand but it’s something you get use too. Sometimes you don’t even realize how unhealthy you are, like, how alone and sad you truly are. That’s the scariest part of feelings like that, it’s a slow change and it consumes you, kind of like depression. It’s scary how much loneliness you can really achieve at such a young age, but I honestly feel like everyone feels lonely.

I have the most wonderful friends and family in my life, and rarely feel lonely. I get attention, someone to listen to me, comfort me, and be there through the best of times, and it’s such a great feeling to know that people love you. Loneliness is a kind of feeling you can even feel if you’re surrounded by people. Sometimes you just feel like the people who love you, don’t anymore. You start thinking, how could anyone really love me?

It’s a downhill slide from there, my darling. I just think it’s so hard for teenagers these days. It’s so obvious if you don’t have friends. you are constantly surrounded by pictures and tweets of people having fun and partying, and if you aren’t doing that, it becomes obvious pretty quickly.

Plus, people are MEAN. Like, super mean. Girls will literally try and ruin your life over boys and other stupid drama. People are so harsh with body image and beauty standards, it’s so easy to feel lonely. Like you don’t matter to anyone. No wonder the suicide rates are so high, people just ignore you. There’s so much going on, that so much goes wrong.

I can’t stress enough how important it is to make sure the people you love, know you love them and that you will always love them. Because in a world like today, love and kindness are the rarest thing you can find and it’s so valuable. I just hope we can all soften ourselves and be more loving and generous. If you want a prime example of perfection, just ask my best friend Emily Parker. I love you all. Think before you speak. Sit with that weird kid at lunch. Make a fucking difference with your life.
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Urinetown.

So, I never go to the musicals at my school because I hate my school and a lot of the people in it. Anyways, I really wanted to see the mmusical we have at our school, called Urinetown. Now, my school has a pretty good department for the drama. Usually I don’t tend to enjoy plays/musicals at my school, but this one was exceptionally good. It actually made me laugh pretty hard, and I usually don’t think that school functions are very funny because humor is so forced but this play was witty and sarcastic.

We have some really talented people who preform and it’s just amazing to me how great they are so early on. I just think it’s really important to support people who have talent, because you want them to continue to do what they love. I honestly didn’t think it would be that good, but I seriously loved it. They definitely proved me wrong.

Anything with Mary Mathis in it is going to be amazing so I knew it wouldn’t be awful, but I just really recommend going. I think that the plot was very well thought out, and it made me laugh so if it made me laugh, it will probably make you laugh! I don’t know what else to say other than that I loved the pregnant character. She was so sassy.

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Everything Sucks

It’s a beautiful day today and what is miss Rose doing? Laying in bed, inside her house, about to cry. Why you ask? Well, I struggle with depression and I guess today was the day for the monsters to rear there ugly heads.

I feel like there’s this huge myth about depression. Anyone can suffer from it. ANYONE. It’s awful. It sneaks up on you. It’s like cancer, in a way. You don’t really know the real cause of it, and good people can be affected by depression. Nobody really knows how to cure it so they just nuke your body with Prozac or Zoloft. Nobody really knows what to say to you when you’re going through what I call a “numbing spell” which is what happens when you feel nothing. It’s a depression thing.

“I hate over thinking, I just hate thinking in general. Like nothing could be wrong, everything could be going completely fine and then bam. My brain decides to take a scenario and make it the worst situation ever, when in reality everything is going perfectly fine.” This is exactly how I feel. Do you understand now?

I can’t explain this to someone who has never struggled with depression as long as I have. It’s a constant battle, and it’s really hard to keep going on with your life as if nothing is wrong.
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Caged

Am I the only one who feels super trapped in a relationship? I don’t know what it is but I just like feeling free. I don’t like worrying about someone else, I need to worry about myself. Don’t get me wrong, I love taking care of people, but seriously, I hate how clingy and scary things get after you label it. How is it any different than before? My theory is that it’s public and you have committed yourselves to one another, and that’s scary.

Once you’ve been in an abusive relationship, everything kind of changes. It’s not so much fun anymore. You worry that everyone will hurt you, and you wonder if being happy with someone for a little bit is really worth years of pain and the mental abuse you recieve. How do you really know this new guy will be different? You don’t really. I once had a friend who told me “overthinking smothers, and kills love. you need to do as you feel.” I think that is great advice, but at the same time, you need to protect yourself. No matter what always but your well-being first. No guy is worth your state of being.

I don’t know love is scary. It’s beautiful but I don’t see myself ever being fulfilled by a man. I’m happy on my own, men just add to that happiness. I don’t need a man to be happy. Yes, it’s nice to have someone to talk too. Yes, it’s nice to have someone to cuddle with. But in all honesty, my friends talk to me and cuddle with me and I love them. It’s not so bad being alone in this world. Because you aren’t alone just because your single. We need to stop telling ourselves we need someone to be happy because that’s utter bullshit and everyone knows that deep down.

You can’t rely on someone else to make you happy, you need to make yourself happy first. I always tell my friends that they need to love themselves first before they can ever expect a man to love them and it’s so true. A guy doesn’t want to be with someone who can’t stand themselves and I can’t be with a guy who doesn’t like themselves. It just doesn’t work that way. Everyone needs to just relax and wait because that special person is out there, and you may not know who they are but if you sit there and date alll the wrongs, you might miss the “one”. Trust me, I know from expirence, I use to always be in a relationship and I wasn’t happy. I missed a lot of expirences because of it. Sure, it was fun while it lasted but I wasted so much time on these shitty guys. I was so young, but I didn’t care. I did what I want and know that I look on it I just shake my head.

Slow down. Enjoy your life. Enjoy being single.
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